Years ago I found myself in a situation whereby I had total collapse of peace and happiness in my life. A very treasured relationship had abruptly ended and with it a lot of other weighty scenarios. Being an avid reader and having all the time to myself, I read everything on how to heal your life, how to move on and most importantly how to forgive. At that point I thought someone had really messed me up. We all know – theoretically though that it is good to forgive others but when you continue to feel a twinge of anger, jealously, hurt, need for revenge etc. against another you think has wronged you, then trust me, your well-meant intentions of forgiving them have not yielded very good results. Unfortunately we cannot experience true peace and happiness when total forgiveness has not taken place in our individual hearts. If you value happiness like I do, then you can imagine how frustrated you would feel if in your heart you are still experiencing blocks to peace.
I stopped trying to forgive and asked God to teach me how to do it best. From that point of asking, a journey, different from others I had taken before started. Way into this journey I realized that it was not only about forgiving the other person but forgiving myself as well, even on so many other unrelated issues. At this point in my life, what was being pointed to me was the ideal of FORGIVENESS in a very broad sense. I sought and was inspired by teachings of many great teachers. I was very intently drawn to the self-study spiritual program of A COURSE IN MIRACLES because it helped me grasp an all-inclusive meaning of forgiveness and this course is based on this spiritual theme of forgiveness for the attainment of inner peace.
(To learn more about. ACIM, contact Lydia)
Your state and stage in your personal growth could be pointing to another theme and if you are committed to finding the inner peace (peace of God that passes all understanding) you will be guided to find at the right time what you need to do at your stage.
So is life for me perfect? a big NO, only that the time it takes to regain my peace back has drastically reduced- like Alice in wonderland, when I have wondered in the world enough and have been conformed to the world enough and in effect have failed to experience my sense of peace, the path back to this experience is now far much shorter and more gentle.